First Ade then Paul – Nixon Goes To China

This week, our bold heroes daringly discuss Reforms to the Department of Justice & Publishing and Research in the Information Age.

Sick Prick

Well folks, it got through! Yes, my new duo of short stories managed to make it onto amazon despite the oh-so-slightly-offensive title and blurb. Hazzah! So, without further ado…

I am thrilled to announce “Sick Prick” will be available from the 28th of Feb. Once again the artwork is by the exceptionally talented Tom Charles who has also proven an effective bulwark against the dreaded typos. Without him these two releases wouldn’t have been possible.

MOLLY’S GRAVE (Psychological Horror)

Aunt Molly meant everything to him, but now Aunt Molly is gone. And if he doesn’t unearth her in time, he’ll be forced to watch her return.

SICK PRICK (Splatterpunk Horror)

In retrospect, I shouldn’t have fucked Karen. The lesser of two reasons why this was such a dreadful idea was the fact that Karen didn’t want me to. As I stood behind her, pumping away, I could just about imagine her appreciative groans, and I suppose in a way she was groaning, though not on my behalf. No, as I delivered my jack-rabbit thrusts, Karen bucked and thrashed, and if it were not for the restraints I think she might have killed me. No kisses for poor old Morris, no tender whispers of erotic seduction. Just the snapping of teeth, the twitching of limbs, and the slop falling from between her legs.

Which brings me onto the second and more pressing reason why shagging this beauty was, on reflection, such a colossal no-no. Karen, you see, was dead.

Available to pre-order now.

UK http://www.amazon.co.uk/Sick-Prick-Ade-Grant-ebook/dp/B00TOW6R3Y/

US http://www.amazon.com/Sick-Prick-Ade-Grant-ebook/dp/B00TOW6R3Y/

Mariner Giveaway

The Mariner is available for free on Amazon from 22/03 – 23/03. Why not snare your free copy today? Some quotes from readers:

The Mariner, Free Giveaway!

“Ade Grant’s particular brand of psychological horror is a corrosive assault on the reader’s morals, which repeatedly promises reprieve, only to smash all hopes with a barrage of harrowing imagery and bitter-sweet revelations.”

“I felt the flow was like that of a road-trip, a nightmare highway journey… The Mariner himself made me wince at my species, at my sex especially.”

“…a polemic, twenty-first century “Gulliver’s Travels” of satirical fantasy. I think that it is a surreal, political, critical and analytical allegory. It seems to challenge perceived politics, religion, science, reason and physiology.
Read and think.”

“I was so completely disturbed at times, and at others times I was disgusted. At times I hated the Mariner character – wanted to end his wretched life myself – and at times I empathized with him greatly, wanted to protect him. It was a very difficult book to read at times, though the story was so engrossing I couldn’t stop. And when they end came around – though still some things were left deliberately without answers – I was completely fulfilled and left the story, in my opinion, a better person than when I started.”

USA Link
UK Link
Check it out on Goodreads

Mariner Redesign Finalised

And the final version is….

The Mariner, Kindle Edition

Bravo, and huge thanks to artist Christopher Hayes!

Blogger, writer and editor C.W.Rhodes recently reviewed The Mariner for his blog. Below is an except:

“I haven’t felt so many wonderfully conflicting emotions while reading a book in a long time. This story is the wildest of rides – fast paced, energetic, unafraid, relentless, exhilarating, disturbing, and smart. I absolutely loved it. The plot was magnificent and revealed its points in such a way that was always exciting, always changing, always moving forward into some new territory. There are so many interesting ideas thrown into it that not only kept me entertained, but intellectually interested in what was being said.”

To read more, check out the full review here.

Review: Bleed by Ed Kurtz

Bleed by Ed Kurtz is available through Amazon!

Amazon Description:

When Walt Blackmore moves into an old gable front house on the outskirts of a small town, things are really looking up for him; he has an adoring girlfriend to whom he plans to propose, a new job teaching English at the local high school, and an altogether bright future. His outlook and destiny are irreparably changed, however, when an unusual dark red spot appears on the ceiling in the hallway. Bit by bit, the spot grows, first into a dripping blood stain and eventually into a grotesque, muttering creature.

As the creature grows, Walt finds himself more and more interested in fostering its well-being. At first he only feeds it stray animals so that the blood-hungry monster can survive, but this soon fails to satisfy the creature’s ghastly needs. It is gradually becoming human again, and for that to happen it requires human blood and human flesh. And once Walt has crossed the line from curiosity to murder, there is no going back…

Ade’s Review:

Okay, let’s get this out the way first – it’s a bit like Hellraiser! Right, now we can move on, because to become bogged down in comparisons would do this enjoyable quick-paced romp through a hellish abattoir a terrible disservice.

Bleed is classic horror tale in the sense that it is about a small group of characters in a remote setting, trying to deal with a peculiar scenario in which they should really seek professional help. Of course, this is not what they do, and the story descends into bloody mayhem. As a reader, struggling against it will collapse the whole damn lot on top of you like so much unbelievable mush, but if you go with the flow you’ll find moments of gruesome hilarity. I loved the tea-party-like dismissal of government help when the lead character discovers a monster growing out of his ceiling!

What is strongest in Ed Kurtz’ novel is the writing. Despite the constant butchering the descriptions never feel tired and we are constantly repulsed by the graphic prose. I was kept guessing about certain elements of the plot right until the end, quite an achievement given the relatively straight-forward story. Alas, I feel the narrative goes on a little too long for the concept and could do with being trimmed by a couple of killings.

Verdict:

Bleed is a piece of visceral entertainment, much like an 80’s splatter movie. Kurtz doesn’t overburden the story; he takes a concept and exploits it to its full potential, showing surprising restraint for the genre. If you want some gore with a creative flair, you can’t go wrong with this.

Bleed is available through Amazon here

Visit Ed Kurtz’ blog

Review: Bottled Abyss by Benjamin Kane Ethridge

Bottled Abyss is Available Through Amazon

Amazon Description:

YOU’VE TAKEN PAYMENT FOR A DEATH THAT DOESN’T BELONG TO YOU.

WHAT WERE THREE ARE NOW ONE, AND I AM FURY…

Herman and Janet Erikson are going through a crisis of grief and suffering after losing their daughter in a hit and run. They’ve given up on each other, they’ve given up on themselves. They are living day by day. One afternoon, to make a horrible situation worse, their dog goes missing in the coyote-infested badlands behind their property. Herman, resolved in preventing another tragedy, goes to find the dog, completely unaware he’s on a hike to the River Styx, which according to Greek myth was the border between the Living World and the world of the Dead.

Long ago the gods died and the River dried up, but a bottle containing its waters still remains in the badlands. What Herman discovers about the dark power contained in those waters will change his life forever…

Ade’s Review:

The terrible price of working miracles is one of my favourite horror themes and one that Benjamin Kane Ethridge explores to gruesome effect. Bottled Abyss mixes Barker-esque blood baths with ancient mythology to create a story that sprints along checking off genres as it goes. What begins as an eerie exploration of a traumatised relationship, twists into a dark thriller and then finally contorts itself into grand fantasy.

This mix of the mythic and mundane is at its most effective in the first section of the story, where the characters are struggling to comprehend their situation. As the narrative progresses we see continual perspective shifts that allow a wider comprehension of the story, but also detract from our emotional attachment.

In the final genre shift we explore the themes and mythology of the piece in greater depth, thus gaining a greater understanding of the concept Ethridge intended. This was the most gripping and stimulating section, but somewhere along the way I felt the characters had been left behind. So much dehumanisation had taken place, there wasn’t much left to root for.

Verdict:

Bottled Abyss drags by the balls whilst dangling lights before the eyes. At its heart this is a gory horror, but the fantastical twist helps the tale slide down easy.

Bottled Abyss is available on Amazon.

Review: Development Hell by Mick Garris

Amazon Description:

Development Hell by Mick Garris – Available on Amazon!

Hollywood, California: the Bermuda Triangle of art, sex, and commerce. The beautiful people make their daily deals with the devil on the sun-dappled patio at the Ivy, not in a fiery underground cavern. Nobodies become somebodies in the blink of an eye, but the flash of heady success can be fleeting. The rocket that shoots you into the atmosphere can be carrying weapons of mass destruction that can send you just as quickly and efficiently to Hell.

And back to Heaven again.

Development Hell is a wicked Hollywood satire, disguised as an extreme erotic horror novel. It is told knowingly from an inside perspective, tracking the career trajectory of a young film school hotshot into the annals of the Big Studio.

This arrogant young director leads us through his own set of unique experiences, starting with his explosive and disastrous first Hollywood movie; his discovery of a mutant baby in the arms of a Mexican news dealer in downtown Los Angeles that will be his ticket back to the top of the heap; into the arms of a re-animated glamorous star who died in the 1930s; and body-hopping through the most glamorous sheaths of human flesh on the planet.

It is a side of Hollywood rarely seen from beneath its unvarnished, Botox-free, crinkling, wrinkling flesh, and features a supporting cast of characters you will surely recognize.

Development Hell welcomes you into a behind-the-scenes peek unlike any other you have witnessed before.

Ade’s Review:

When I was a youngster I watched Stephen King’s The Stand on television. I remember it was during the great mad cow disease scare and due to the combination of that apocalyptic film and the hysterical news coverage I got it into my head that we’d soon all be dropping like flies and I’d have to smother my family with pillows before the end.

Fortunately this never actually happened, but I was left with a love for that adaptation of The Stand, which years later I learned was directed by Mick Garris. I didn’t seek out Development Hell with Garris in mind; rather it became a very happy coincidence that the director who enthralled me in childhood would write a book I would so thoroughly enjoy almost two decades later.

Development Hell is a long crawl through the shit-pipes of Hollywood. Our protagonist (the archetype of Hollywood hack: huge ego and zero talent) rises and falls over and over like waves on a turbulent sea, forever given chances and each time blowing them in spectacular fashion. And yet, as despicable as the lead character is, the world as seen through his eyes remains an honest one, a true depiction of the shallow excesses of the industry.

I was drawn to Development Hell after reading the first chapter in a short stories splatterpunk compilation and although the novel never reaches the same heights as that first gruesome tale, the narrative is interesting, witty and even touching at times. You can never quite bring yourself to root for the main character, although you do identify with him, a peculiar mix that captures his own self-loathing perfectly.

I would recommend this book to anyone who knows enough about the film industry to appreciate the satire, even those with weak stomachs who would be put off by the (brilliant) opening section. There is much more to this book than graphic sex and nauseating descriptions: brutal self-deprecating hilarious honesty.

Verdict:

A true master of the splatterpunk genre: someone who sees disgusting content as a means to an end, rather than the end in itself.

Development Hell by Mick Garris is available here for £1.99. A bargain!

Mariner Giveaway

From 23/01/2013 – 27/01/2013 The Mariner is available for free from Amazon.

The Mariner by Ade Grant

Available for free on Amazon until 27/01/2013

Sailing through an endless ocean on an antique slaver, the Mariner is hopelessly alone. The few remaining settlements are broken husks peppered with survivors and dangerous cults, each and every one as lost as he. Fixated upon a need for answers in a world full of rot and with a deep sadomasochist streak, he’s a pervert, an addict and a monster, and might just hold the key to finding a route home.

“Ade Grant’s particular brand of psychological horror is a corrosive assault on the reader’s morals, which repeatedly promises reprieve, only to smash all hopes with a barrage of harrowing imagery and bitter-sweet revelations.”

“I felt the flow was like that of a road-trip, a nightmare highway journey… The Mariner himself made me wince at my species, at my sex especially.”

“…a polemic, twenty-first century “Gulliver’s Travels” of satirical fantasy. I think that it is a surreal, political, critical and analytical allegory. It seems to challenge perceived politics, religion, science, reason and physiology.
Read and think.”

Get it now!

UK Store

US Store

Giveaway!

It was reported to me that a certain Michael Howard was displeased at having to pay the paltry sum of £3 for an Ade Grant book on kindle when he could get Alexandre Dumas for free. I could go on about how Dumas books weren’t free when he was alive and needed to feed himself, but instead of fighting my corner I’m going to surrender…

So I give you:

THE MICHAEL HOWARD GIVEAWAY!

In honour of this gent’s stingy ways, for three days, starting today, you can get The Mariner kindle edition for free! Head on over and enjoy:

As Baldrick's sign says, "Get It Here"

The Mariner Sails Online!

It’s been long in the coming, but here it finally is…

Available Now!

Available Now!

Hate Rage Persecution Mutilation Isolation
Guilt Perversity Self-Harm Paedophilia Alcoholism
Deviancy Devils Zombies Ostracism Pornography
Wasps Insanity Masturbation Loneliness Voyeurism
Addiction Murder Rape Depression
True-Love & THE MARINER

Sailing through an endless ocean on an antique slaver, the Mariner is hopelessly alone. The few remaining settlements are broken husks peppered with survivors and dangerous cults, each and every one as lost as he. Fixated upon a need for answers in a world full of rot and with a deep sadomasochist streak, he’s a pervert, an addict and a monster, and might just hold the key to finding a route home.

A post-apocalyptic jaunt through a psycho-sexual nightmare, Ade Grant’s debut novel takes an uncomfortably honest appraisal of male sexuality and acts as an enema to the very darkest elements that lurk within us all.

Many thanks to Christopher and Paul Hayes on this one. Check out the links below to get your copy!

Kindle Edition
Hardback Edition